Life Changes (Hope Springs Eternal)
by secwaters
Summary: The third of my stories about the Swallows, Amazons, Ds and Eels as adults - this one is set in the 1980s. Once again to make sense of some of the story it helps to have read my previous two! (Rated T as it is really for adult readers who are familiar with all the S & A books.) I've given this a new title as the original has been used here - apologies!
1. Chapter 1

HOPE SPRINGS ETERNAL

HOPE SPRINGS ETERNAL

not by the author of Swallow and Amazons

CONTENTS

I ALL TOGETHER

II DOT'S THOUGHTS

III TOGETHER AT BECKFOOT

IV DOT REMEMBERS

V NEWS IN THE POST

VI THE BISCUIT TIN

VII EXPLANATIONS

VIII DICK'S DILEMMA

IX REVENGE

X THE MESSAGE

XI BECKFOOT AGAIN

XII NANCY DELIBERATES

XIII WHAT DO WE DO?

XIV PEGGY'S CONFUSION

XV THE BOATHOUSE

XVI SUSAN ON DUTY

XVII BREAKFAST

VIII JOHN'S CONFUSION

XIX WILD CAT ISLAND

XX TITTY ALONE

XXI ROGER TRIES TO UNDERSTAND

XXII RETURN TO BECKFOOT

XXIII DAISY WORRIES

XXIV IN THE KITCHEN

XXV DICK'S ANSWER

XXVI SUPPER

XXVII BECKFOOT PLUMBING

XXVIII GRAND OPENING

XXIX NEW ARRIVAL

XXX NEW BEGININGS

XXXI TOM'S THOUGHTS

AUTHOR'S NOTE

After 1933 we know nothing of the Swallows, Amazons, Ds and their compatriots. In 'Different Territory' I recounted the gathering of some of them in 1947, and what changes took place in their lives. With 'Vanished and Discovered' I told of what paths their lives took in the nineteen sixties. Now it is the nineteen eighties and the childhood friendships are still maintained.

_A resident of Secret Water._

_2014_

TO

AGAIN J FOR STILL MAKING ALL

MY LIFE WORTH LIVING.

CHAPTER I

ALL TOGETHER

"**W**e only seem to meet at funerals now!" Nancy called out as she approached the church. Susan knew this was not true, but knew all too well that Nancy liked to make exaggerated statements about things, often to cover up her true feelings.

Nancy was unusually attired, not only in black, but in a dress, a dress that actually fitted her, that suited her and clearly had been bought for the occasion.

Nancy ran up to Susan and hugged her in greeting as she stood waiting, she too was dressed in black, the starkness of her clothes broken by the colours of her medal ribbons bar immaculately positioned on the left-hand side of her coat.

The village church, quite near to the lake, was on higher ground and stood out from the surrounding woods and the hills, dry stone walls lead up from the road along side the path to those encompassing the churchyard.

Susan was standing by the metal gateway in the wall that surrounded the churchyard, from there she had a view back down to the narrow road, Nancy and Daisy had only just arrived. Susan then in turn greeted and embraced Daisy, similarly in black, who now nervously stood next to Nancy, knowing all too well that even after all these years there still might be one or two people not actually pleased to see her there, she was never sure so she found it was best to be mentally ready.

"Are you alright?" Susan asked her, noticing, and very aware of her possibly being uncomfortable, Daisy smiled weakly and nodded.

The three of them stood chatting about the awfulness of having to meet in such circumstances as they were awaiting the arrival of the hearse, they were soon joined at the gate to the church by Titty and Dick, holding hands as ever, with Dorothea following a few steps behind them. Dick and Dot were also dressed in black, but Titty was wearing a dark red dress, with no dark coloured coat or scarf to somehow tone it down, she could tell from the look on Susan's face that she did not approve.

"Hello Susan, I know, I know, it's too bright, but you know I just cannot wear black!" Susan said nothing. Titty then turned, waited for Dot to catch up and put her arm through hers and drew her close to herself so they stood next to each other. Nancy, Daisy and Susan greeted the three of them, and Susan was pleased to see, despite the solemn occasion, Titty and Dick seemed as happy as ever, it was only Dot that looked mournful. Titty spoke to her quietly hoping the others would not hear.

"Come on Dot, we'll face this all together!" Dick and Susan just looked on at her sympathetically, they were all feeling sad and knew it was not going to be easy for any of them.

"Are the others here?" asked Dick. Susan having got there early, too early really but prompt as always, had been watching the arrivals of mourners, not that there was as many as she expected, but she had been at the church first of all the friends.

"Roger's not here, I thought he was probably not up to it, he understands what's happened but tends to get over-emotional about such things and then panic sets in, then he becomes much more difficult to deal with so I thought it best he stayed at home." Titty was disappointed he was not there but not at all surprised.

"Things are much same with him then." She commiserated with Susan. "I don't suppose you have heard anything from Bridget?"

"Yes, I had a letter in response to mine telling her the news, she's sorry she can't be here, it is a long way, she's fine and still doing well, works too hard, and she hopes to be home for Christmas." Nancy spoke across her.

"Are Peggy and John here yet?" Susan answered her.

"Yes, they arrived just after me, they went straight in to the church. Peggy didn't want to stand around out here, she actually said she would rather not be here at all, which was a bit harsh."

"What about their brats!" Grinning as she asked, Nancy was seemingly enjoying being rude about her only niece and nephew. Susan was always surprised by this, with no children of her own they were a joy to her, but she supposed Nancy was not going to change now.

"No, no, John told them not to come and it would have been difficult for them both to get here from their universities."

At that moment they could see way back down at the lane a slow moving black hearse followed by a black limousine, both polished to an unbelievable shine, eventually the two vehicles pulled up at the start of the path to the church.

The church was not far from the fells where many, many years before all of them had mined for gold, they had found copper but, more importantly, for those who lived there, they had saved a number of farms from a serious fire, something that had been an ever-present danger during that remarkably hot summer. The funeral, as it turned out, was also one of the few occasions they were all together, Swallows, Amazon's and Ds. Daisy, one of the Eels, being no part of the mining adventure years ago was there because of the great love of her life and companion, Nancy.

Over the years it had come about that none of them had married or made any kind of romantic relationship outside the circle of friends, something that had just seemed to have happened by chance. So now they were all gathered once more, fifty-odd years on from those early days, and their childhood-forged allegiances were still as strong. As many old friends did of their age when they gathered together, what brought them closer most often, as now, was the death of one of their number, so it was on this warm but gloomy afternoon in the autumn of nineteen eighty-two.

As they watched the hearse they could see the undertaker's men begin to remove the coffin ready to be borne by them on their shoulders in to the church, as they did the mourners got out of the limousine ready to file in after it.

"Time we went inside!" Commanded Nancy, taking Daisy's hand in her own and then strode, almost pulling her, towards the church door, the others following, yet again almost meekly just obeying the captain's orders.

Almost three-quarters of an hour later, the service was over and they all left the church, there was not a dry eye amongst the women, even Nancy. The friends followed the procession behind the coffin from church to the graveyard, and they ended up standing around the graveside along with a few family members as the vicar carried out the committal. At the appropriate moment the undertaker's men slowly lowered the pale wood coffin, using broad webbing straps through its handles, in to the grave. The vicar intoned the words of the service as many had done before him.

"Forasmuch as it hath pleased Almighty God of his great mercy to take unto himself the soul of our dear brother Timothy Stedding..."

Titty soon stopped listening to the vicar's actual words as she thought of the wooden hutch garlanded with flowers and cut-out letters to make the word 'WELCOME' they had made for Timothy, they had all imagined he was an armadillo shipped to Beckfoot by Nancy and Peggy's Uncle Jim, Captain Flint from South America and who had told them by telegram to give 'Timothy', the run of his study. Dick, similarly distracted, was thinking of how he helped 'Squashy Hat', as they had named the stranger who followed their mining activities in the fells, with the analysis of what had been mined a year later. By then they knew he was Captain Flint's young protégé, and not a rival prospector trying to 'jump' their claim and he certainly was not an armadillo! Nancy too stopped listening and thought of the fells not so far away from where they stood, and how the gold she so wanted to find to impress Uncle Jim with had eluded them.

Nancy's reminiscing was then broken by the sound of a gentle sobbing, not loud but loud enough that she knew it had to be of someone near to her. She looked across to her left to see Dot crying, Titty standing next to Dot delved in to her handbag and after a moment's rummaging passed to her a freshly laundered handkerchief, then continued to look down at the coffin in the grave, its brass plaque the only brightness in the gloom.

Of all of them Titty knew she was the only one who fully understood Dot's grief over Timothy's death.

Nowadays seventy was no longer considered that old, most people of seventy still had much to do with their lives and some, like Timothy, had made plans. But his plans did not allow for his death.

Once the committal was over and the family moved away from the grave, the friends all lined up with the other mourners and paid the necessary, but fleeting, respects to Timothy's widow. They all politely declined the almost obligatory invitation to tea from her, knowing that she and her family would not really want to converse with any of those having a connection of any kind with the late Jim Turner.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER II

DOT"S THOUGHTS

**D**ot had very vivid memories of when she had met Timothy once more in adulthood, it was long after her childhood and long after the war was over. During those childhood years he had been part of their adventures, the last time was when he had reluctantly taken part in the deception of Nancy and Peggy's great aunt Maria, the hated GA, while she and Dick lived secretly in the old stone hut in the woods near Beckfoot known as the Dog's Home. Timothy, at the time, was living on Captain Flint's houseboat carrying out analysis of rock samples from the mine they had discovered the previous year, with help from Dick.

Timothy and Dot's first encounter years later took place one day when she went to see Titty at the flat in London she lived in for a short time in the early nineteen sixties, she arrived to find Captain Flint visiting, he often came to see her so this on its own was no surprise. What was a surprise to her was that with him was a man she only vaguely recognised. He though, she could tell, immediately recognised her, and greeted her enthusiastically. As he did so she realised that he was 'Squashy Hat'! It was almost thirty years since they last met.

In that brief moment she was reminded of how all the years before she had thought him handsome, and was pleased to see despite the passing of the years he still was. She remembered cooking for him, scrambled eggs, in Captain Flint's houseboat when she and Dick visited him, it had been his first proper meal for a few days he had admitted, and for her it was the first time she had actually cooked for someone, not including Dick of course; but then in these situations your brother does not count as 'someone'.

In Titty's flat that day as she talked to Timothy the scrambled egg incident had come to mind, and the thought of this seemingly simple act for this handsome man sent a little shudder through her body and what almost seemed like a flutter in her heart.

Despite being a novelist of some success, whose books included elements of romance, she had been appalled when some reviewers referred to her as a 'romantic novelist'. Her novels included many things, but she was wary of writing about romance because she had little experience of such things, as there was not much material in her life to draw upon. Her own romantic history was limited, during the war she sometimes went out with Titty and two men, mostly because Titty needed to make up a four, but almost none of them ever asked her out on her own and if they did it was rarely repeated. It was Titty who was the attraction, she seemed to attract and collect men with ease.

This lack of male attention did not bother Dot, she lived to write, and the small amount of her life not dedicated to writing was taken up with letters to Dick, wherever he may be, and helping Titty to keep her life in some kind of order, including steering her away from the obviously unsuitable men she seemed to have a knack of attracting on occasions.

Over the years following this meeting Dot and Timothy's paths often crossed, usually when Captain Flint came visiting Titty, and on such occasions it became their habit for all of them go to lunch or dinner together as they enjoyed each other's company. Captain Flint, or Jim as he now encouraged them to call him, was to her just like, as he actually was to Nancy and Peggy, an uncle. But Timothy, he was different. Certainly he was a bit older than her and Titty, but not that much, and there was something about him that whenever she knew they were to meet up she looked forward to it more than most of the other events in her rather quiet life.

One such evening, they were all due to meet at Dot's flat, then go out together for dinner. So when her doorbell rang in the late afternoon of the agreed day she had expected all of them or at least Titty to be at the door, but it was Timothy on his own. He was full of apologies for being so early and he even offered to go away and return later, by which time he was sure Titty and Jim would have arrived, Dot would not hear of it, she invited him in and made them both a pot of tea. As they sat in the living room and drank their tea they talked of many things that afternoon, he was well read, he had even read every one of her published novels, which surprised her, and spoke of them in flattering terms, they shared many interests and had similar views on many subjects so the conversation easily flowed between them.

With Jim and Titty still not having arrived an hour or so later, Dot offered Timothy more tea, he accepted and she went to the kitchen to make a fresh pot.

On her return he was standing by her writing desk, as she placed the teapot on the tea-tray on the desk and let go of the handle Timothy gently grasped her wrist, he then pulled her towards him and kissed her, kissing her full on the lips, an unmistakable passionate kiss. She was flustered by the suddenness but not disappointed by this gesture, she had thought of it many times occurring between them, but only in the way she often thought out scenes for her novels never imagining it would ever happen. As quickly as he kissed her he let go of her wrist and immediately apologised, she rejected his apology telling him it was unnecessary and at that moment the doorbell rang once more. She went off to answer it.

With the arrival of Jim and Titty what happened between Dot and Timothy had passed and was almost forgotten, they went for dinner and the usual pleasant evening was had by all of them. Timothy and Jim spent a lot of the time discussing mining, much of which was beyond Dot's comprehension and Titty's too, so the two of them discussed, as they often did, Dick and what kind of romantic life he had in the USA where he now worked. The possibility of him having many girlfriends and what they were like never ceased to fascinate the two women.

When the four of them went their separate ways at the end of the evening they kissed each other on the cheek in farewell as they always did, Timothy gave no suggestion when he kissed Dot of how he had kissed her that afternoon and made no mention of it. Once back at her flat Dot wrote her diary for the day as she always did before bed, and alluded to Timothy's visit and what happened, thinking that perhaps it was not a good idea to yet go in to any detail.

The next morning Titty telephoned her, as she often did after these occasions to talk about what went on, and wondered if Dot had noticed that there was something different about Timothy, speculating to her that maybe he had yet another new girlfriend.


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER III

TOGETHER AT BECKFOOT

**L**eaving the churchyard they all made their way back to the various cars some of them had arrived in and had parked in one of the narrow roads nearby, and once seats were organised for them all they drove the few miles north to Beckfoot. With the death of Uncle Jim, and then their mother, Molly, the house had been left jointly to Nancy and Peggy. John and Peggy, now that John had retired from the navy, lived there permanently so dealing with its day-to-day upkeep. Nancy and Daisy visited as often as they could from their own cottage on the edge of the Essex Backwaters, but made little financial contribution. On arrival at the house the cars were parked in the stable yard, and they all entered the house by the rear through the kitchen door.

Once back inside the house and divested of their coats they all sat around the kitchen table, not bothering with the dining room overlooking the river and the lake, this was rarely used now. Peggy filled the kettle and began to make tea for everyone, while she did Daisy cut slices of the fruitcake she had brought with her, baked still using the old Cook's recipe. Each of them was still unusually quiet, only exchanging occasional pleasantries, each of them was engrossed in their own thoughts about Timothy.

"He was still young! Well youngish, not that much older than all of us really!" Nancy spoke what all of them had thought about at some time since hearing the news of his death some weeks before.

"Who was it who gave the tribute, whoever he was he knew nothing about him!" Dick was clearly annoyed, he had worked with Timothy and they shared many interests and skills and he would have liked to have said some words of appreciation of his life and the depth of his knowledge. John answered him; the terseness and anger in his voice was clearly not directed at Dick.

"It was his wife's brother."

"I didn't know she had one!" Nancy once again spoke her mind. "We all knew him better than that galoot!" Since Timothy had married nearly fifteen years before, the only contact some of them had with him was when he met up with some of them on his occasional visits to London. They had all got the impression, early on in his marriage, that his wife did not approve of his friends that he had made when all of them were still children.

Peggy handed around cups of tea to them all, other than for Nancy who she knew always preferred hers in her own mug, which she kept for her in the kitchen dresser. They all helped themselves to the slices of cake Daisy had piled on to a large plate. Titty tried to change the subject, having glanced across at Dot and seen the look on her face, she felt at this time it would be the best thing to do.

"Daisy, you make such wonderful cake! Even Cook's was never this good!" Daisy blushed, even after all her years with Nancy the others still managed to surprise her sometimes in their warmth and acceptance of her. Peggy though was not distracted, and turned the conversation back to Timothy, particularly his wife.

"I didn't liked her, then I only met her once, but she was nasty and it was her fault I'm sure that none of us got invited to the wedding!" There was a general murmuring and nodding of agreement about this long held injustice.

John finished his cup of tea, cleared his throat with an almost theatrical noisiness and began to speak, and did so in a manner, as he often did, as if he was addressing the crew of his ship as he did in his navy days.

"It's just us now, the last ones, isn't time we did something together, it may be our last chance."


	4. Chapter 4

CHAPTER IV

DOT REMEMBERS

**A** few days on from the afternoon when Timothy had kissed her, Dot was working at her desk on some notes that she hoped would eventually become her next novel. As she did so she was surprised to hear the doorbell ring at such a time of day. It couldn't be Titty as she would usually only call on her unannounced in the morning or evening, otherwise she would telephone in advance, she knew how Dot tried to spend her afternoons writing. On opening the door she had not been expecting to see Timothy.

He was slightly embarrassed looking and holding a small bunch of flowers, he said he was there to apologise to her for his behaviour the previous afternoon he had called on her. Inviting him in she explained once again that no apology was needed, why on earth should there be? She took the flowers from him, thanked him and closed the door and went through to the kitchen to find a vase to arrange them in, he followed her through the flat.

Dot arranged the flowers in the vase on the draining board of the sink with her back to Timothy, during which neither of them had spoken, once finished she then turned and looked at him, as she did so they both seemed to know what was happening between them as she walked across the kitchen towards him. In moments she was being embraced firmly in his encircling arms and they were kissing each other passionately. When at last they parted she took him by the hand and wordlessly led him through to the bedroom, she closed the curtains. Here he undressed her, slowly and carefully, clearly delighting in uncovering her body, and then having removed his own clothes they were naked together beneath the sheets of the bed.

Dot would freely admit she was not that experienced in sex, especially in comparison to Titty, as she knew from when she regaled her with her exploits, but she was not an innocent. She knew full well that when Timothy took her and pleasured her it was with sensitivity and skilfulness, and she would be very fortunate if she ever got to know such passion in another.

When they had explored each others bodies in an almost uncontrollable need for fulfilment of something deep within both of them and they were finally sated, they had got up from the bed, Dot first, washed and dressed and returned to living room to drink tea.

In a most sensible and organized way they discussed what had just happened between them and what they would do next. It was not a difficult conversation, Dot knew full well that Timothy was about to be engaged, even though nothing had been said to either family, and she also knew he had a few 'occasional' girlfriends that meant little or nothing to him. None of this bothered her at all, she did not expect physical ownership of any man she had sex with, what mattered now was in that afternoon of dalliance she had found the man she wanted above any other, a man who had just given her pleasure, the like of which she had never before known.

When Timothy finally left Dot's flat that evening it was with two agreements made between them, the first that he would visit her whenever he could, the other was that neither of them would say anything to anyone of their relationship.


	5. Chapter 5

CHAPTER V

NEWS IN THE POST

**O**ne morning, a month after Timothy's funeral, Dot was sitting at her writing desk attempting to make progress on her next novel. Reading through her notebooks her thoughts were disturbed by the noise of the post arriving. Getting up from her desk she went through to the hall, on the front door mat there was a very official looking letter, picking up this large envelope of heavy, cream laid paper it was addressed to 'Miss Dorothea Callum'. She pulled open the flap of the envelope as she stood in the hall, she could see inside there was a letter on matching paper with a black embossed letterhead with two or three sheets of paper attached with a brass paperclip, and an ordinary white envelope. She returned to her desk, sat down and took the items out of the envelope, the other white envelope was simply addressed to 'Dot' in Timothy's neat handwriting. She placed this envelope to one side on her desk, she was almost scared to open it, instead of doing so she picked up the main letter.

Dear Miss Callum

As solicitors and executors for the late Mr Timothy Stedding we enclose a sealed envelope deposited with us, by Mr Stedding, to be passed to you in the event of his death.

In addition, under the terms of Mr Stedding's will, a copy of which is attached, you are to be the sole beneficiary of a trust fund created from twenty percent only of Mr Stedding's residual estate after the payment of appropriate taxes and legal fees. The final calculation of this amount is currently awaiting settlement of death duties etcetera, but we can inform you that your one-off payment from the trust should result in a sum approximately between ninety thousand pounds and one hundred thousand pounds; you will be notified of the exact amount and its method of payment to you in due course. As the sole beneficiary of the trust you should note that in the will you are not named, this is in accordance with the rules of the trust as set up by Mr Stedding,…

Dot read no further and placed the letter on the desk in front of her and as she did so realised she was shaking violently, she started to call out for someone to help her but remembered, perhaps fortunately, that Titty and Dick were out and she was in the house alone.

She had given up her flat soon after Dick and Titty had married, they had lived in the flat with her for the first few months of their marriage. She not so much gave up her flat, it was more that Dick and Titty agreed that they should have a house, and decided that Dot should share it with them. Dot had objected to this, she had not the money to help in the purchase of a house despite her success as a novelist and, more importantly, she had no wish to disrupt their married life. Neither Titty nor Dick would hear of it, the closeness of both of them to Dot made such an idea unthinkable.

So within a few months of the idea being mooted by Dick a house in Hampstead was duly purchased, and it was large enough to enable Dot to have her own writing room with a window overlooking the heath. It was here she was sitting contemplating the evidence of her tragedy on her desk.

To delay the opening of the other envelope further, still waiting for her on the desk, she went in to the kitchen and made herself a cup of coffee. As she did so she realised she was taking as long as possible over this simple task, just to avoid dealing with the other letter. She wished Titty was there, but if she had of been then Dick would be there as well; but he knew nothing of her situation and probably when he did know he would not understand the way her life had turned out.

Coffee prepared, she carried the cup back to her desk, then sat down and picked up the other envelope. She had recognised Timothy's writing as soon as it slipped out of the larger envelope. In an ornamental biscuit tin in one of her desk drawers there were a large number of similar envelopes, over the years she had kept every one. She got up from her chair once again and returned to the kitchen to get a knife, she knew there was a letter opener somewhere on the desk, but getting a knife from the kitchen delayed the opening of the envelope even further.

Returning to her desk and sitting down again, she finally picked up the envelope.

Once she had carefully slit the flap she slid out two sheets of notepaper covered in Timothy's neat writing, even before she started to read there were tears in her eyes, but she forced herself to begin.

My Darling Dot

If you are reading this then we both know the inevitable will have happened and events will have caught up with me.

I suppose I've been lucky for so many years over many things but sometimes luck runs out, it must have done so now.

I'm so sorry we were never properly together and that I never committed myself to you when I should have done, but I was always only ever in love with you but I never knew how to leave. I treasured every moment I spent with you, I'm sorry that I treated you so badly and I should have left 'her' many years ago, I should never have married her.

As you should know by now I have made, what I hope is adequate, provision for you in my will, this arrangement I am assured by my solicitor this will not be revealed to those who do not need to know. I plan for you to always be a secret from my terrible wife and in-laws as much as you have been all these years.

My true love has only ever been for you and will always be so.

Goodbye My Darling.

Timothy.


	6. Chapter 6

CHAPTER VI

THE BISCUIT TIN

**T**he biscuit tin in one of Dot's desk drawers was one Timothy had given her the Christmas before they became lovers, the tin was designed, and bought, for its appearance and not for its contents. She treasured it as soon as he had given it to her, and when they did become lovers it was the perfect place to keep the letters he sent to her and continued to do so over their twenty years together.

In the early days and weeks of their affair these were just short notes, affectionate and appreciative remembrances of an afternoon or evening they had spent together. Then, when there were sometimes many days or weeks between their assignations, he wrote longer letters, always expressions of his feelings for her, sometimes his opinions on a book he had recently read, an account of places he had visited or his views on a subject that he knew they shared an interest in.

There were two of the letters that were particularly treasured by Dot, not that any of them weren't, but two were of the most importance to her. The oldest of the two she read and re-read in those times when she was parted from him.

The particular letter, one she had not been expecting, was written and posted so that she received it on the day he got married. Like many of the others it was full of expressions of love and desire, how he loved her both physically and emotionally and would always do so, and it was an outpouring of his regrets of entering in to the marriage, and sorrow on his part for doing so. To her own surprise it gave her some comfort on that day, she knew the marriage was a mistake and that Timothy had been deceived, she was not jealous of his wife, no matter what ceremony the two of them went through it was she, Dot, who would continue to enjoy his true attentions.

The other treasured letter was the last one she had placed in the tin, one she had received just a couple of months ago. At the time Timothy had not visited her for some weeks, he had written to her, but not previously told her he was ill. Now that she shared a house with Dick and Titty his visits had become more difficult, so the long gap between them had not concerned her, though she missed him. In this letter he told her he was feeling better, he had been to hospital for some routine tests and when he was once more able and he would make cause to travel to London, he would then arrange to come and see her.

There was, of course, no more.

Two weeks later the news came from Dick, a late night telephone call from John, that Timothy had suddenly died.


	7. Chapter 7

CHAPTER VII

EXPLANATIONS

**W**hen Dick and Titty returned to the house that morning Dot was still sitting at her desk sobbing, the tears streaming down her cheeks and dripping on to Timothy's last letter. On hearing them as they entered the house she quickly attempted to stuff the letter back in to its envelope. Titty, who had heard her crying as the came in through the front door, rushed in to the writing room, she had realised at once that something was amiss.

"Dot! What is it? What's the matter?" Dot attempted to wipe away her tears with her sleeve as she tried to put the letter back in to the envelope.

"Nothing, nothing, I'm fine!" She was not at all convincing in her denial.

Even Dick, who had followed his wife in to the room, could see that his sister wasn't 'fine'. Titty organised him, she wanted him out of the way but had not the heart not tell him so directly.

"Dick, be a dear and go and make some tea for us all would you?" He could tell at once that this was an instruction to get him out of the room and not just a suggestion. So he left the two of them alone and went off to the kitchen. With Dick out of the way Titty again tried to get from Dot what the matter was.

"What is it Dot? Tell me. Is it this letter?" She had noticed the tear stained document on the desk and Dot's attempts to hide it. "Is it from Timothy?" Titty recognised the writing and had been expecting something like this ever since the funeral. Dot nodded and passed her Timothy's letter to read.

Titty had unwittingly discovered Dot's affair with Timothy many years ago and at the time she had been sworn to secrecy, this secret was one she had willingly and loyally kept, even from Dick. Titty read the letter and felt her own eyes well up. When she had finished reading Dot then passed her the solicitor's letter, she read it and gasped loudly when she got to the part about the trust fund.

At the moment she gasped Dick returned from the kitchen with a tray of mugs of tea.

"Titty! Dot! What on earth is wrong?" He looked worried and confused, his sister was clearly upset and his wife was obviously surprised about something. Titty didn't wait for Dot to speak.

"Tell him Dot, tell him, you must tell him, there's no harm in him knowing, not now."

"Tell me what?" Dick demanded, Dot just looked upset and embarrassed. She still said nothing and was still crying, Dick and Titty sat down, they hoped she would gather her thoughts and explain herself. They only had to wait a few moments before she began.

"Dick. Timothy, well, yes, Timothy," she paused, "we had an affair, for twenty years. He loved me, I loved him." Dick interrupted; his tone was kind and sympathetic, after all this was his sister and his wife's best friend.

"But Dot, he was married." Dick as ever saw the logical aspects of the matter even though he had no wish to judge her. Dot sniffed loudly, hoping to stem her tears.

"He never loved her, she never loved him, she tricked him in to marriage, tricked him for his money, told him she was pregnant, she miscarried weeks after they married, well, she said she did, I don't think she was ever pregnant! But he wouldn't leave her, he was scared, she wasn't stable, she was mad, so mad she threatened to kill herself many times, he could never be sure if it was an act." Dick was still not entirely sure what was happening.

"When did it all start?"

"Before he married, don't you remember, when you first got back from America he visited the flat a lot, well I had been seeing him from a few years before, and you know, these things happen. I always liked him, even when we first met."

"But we were all children then!" Dot, despite her tears, was annoyed with him.

"So were you and Titty!" Dick realised he had been unfair to her, and that the circumstances of those times for them were very different from the lives of many other people.

"Yes, of course, of course, I'm sorry. But why did you carry on when he was married?"

"I loved him, I always did. I knew when it started he had other girlfriends, it didn't bother me, but then he got married, but he wrote to me still and after a few weeks or so we picked up where we had left off, that was when he realised just how much he loved me." Dick looked directly at Titty.

"You knew?"

"Yes, I knew. I found out by accident, about fifteen years ago. I went to Dot's flat one afternoon as it was the closest place to where I was at the time, I'd felt ill, terribly sick, I was supposed to be dowsing for a missing ring for someone, when I arrived Timothy was there, and, well... you can imagine the rest and it was embarrassing but after he'd gone Dot asked me to promise never to say anything to anyone."

"She's been so loyal." Dot was sobbing once more. Dick ignored her and spoke again to Titty having noticed the papers on the desk.

"What's in the letters?" Titty answered.

"One's a goodbye for Dot from Timothy when he knew he was ill, but the other, well." She passed Dick the solicitor's letter. Dick read it quickly.

"What!" Dot knew all too well what her brother's reaction meant.

"I know, I know, what will I do with it, I don't want the money!"


	8. Chapter 8

CHAPTER VIII

DICK"S DILEMMA

**D**ick had been shocked, and worse still found that he could not even tell his wife how he had felt about it all. His sister had been having an affair for twenty years with an older man, an older man they had all known from their childhood, and most of those years he was married!

He tried to rationalise things in his own mind. He did not see Dot's behaviour as immoral, he just couldn't understand it. Over the years he thought she must have had boyfriends, but she never mentioned anyone, she wrote to him in America almost every week and there was a lot of news in her letters but never anything about men. There had been a short time, when he had heard from her about Nancy and Daisy, when he even thought perhaps she was like that too. 'Like that', he couldn't believe what he was thinking, he was happy for Nancy, he had respected her for years, and when she had met up again with Daisy they seemed such an obvious couple.

But Dot? A married man? Was he being overprotective? He felt responsible for his sister, but how could he have been when he was living on the other side of the Atlantic? It occurred to him that they never discussed friendships of any sort other than those they made in childhood, it just never arose. He knew nothing of Dot's 'private' life and, of course, she knew nothing of his; not that there was much to tell. Given his wartime work, and his post-war work, he rarely met women who were interested in the things he was, or understood some of the things he worked on. At Bletchley very few of the code-breakers or those that worked with Tommy Flowers were women, maybe four or five, not that there were none capable, they were just not encouraged. He remembered there was one or two at University, their ability at logic was better than his, what happened to them?

None of these thoughts helped him understand Dot's behaviour. To make it worse, his wife knew.

Titty knew!

He admired her loyalty, but wondered why it extended to exclude him. Then he remembered his work in the war years, who did he tell? Nobody, he was even reluctant to tell Susan in the sixties even though she made it very clear to him she knew. So perhaps Titty's loyalty was not so unusual.

Poor Dot, all that money, what was she going to do with it. She had made it very clear she didn't want it, why, he couldn't quite understand. She wasn't wealthy, it would give her a comfortable life; he supposed she felt she didn't deserve it. But she did, she had been loyal to Timothy, she had caused no trouble when she could have done. No, he thought, this doesn't make sense.

Titty called to him from the kitchen.

"Dick, can you help me?" As he walked through to her he answered.

"Yes, of course." Titty closed the kitchen door as soon as he came in the room.

"Actually I don't need help, Dot's gone to try and get some sleep. What are we going to do?"

"There's not much we can do. She can't refuse it, and if she did the wife may get to find out where it went to."

"Can a solicitor actually hide a bequest like that?"

"I assume he can and that's why Timothy made it part of a trust, the wife will never know unless she spends money going to court, but she's bound to wonder what this trust is for."

"I'm sorry Dick." Titty walked across and kissed him.

"What for, you haven't done anything to be sorry for."

"I didn't tell you about Dot and Timothy, I nearly have over the years, many times."

"You were loyal to Dot, what you knew didn't effect me in any way, so why should you have told me?"


	9. Chapter 9

CHAPTER IX

REVENGE

**A**nother month passed, Dick, Titty and Dot began to realise that the processes of the law sometimes move slowly, but eventually it was all completed. Dot had to attend her own solicitor's office, sign a number of documents, a process she always took Titty with her for moral support. Soon after all these things had been completed Dot's bank account had swollen by nearly one hundred thousand pounds.

As people do in times of loss and grief she tried to get on with her life, to do what she always did in her daily routine, and hoped she would come through it all. As they had always been, afternoons were for writing.

Another morning.

Dot was once again alone in the house and sitting at her writing desk trying to organise notes from her notebook, once more the post is delivered to the house. She hears it flop through the letterbox. She goes through to the hall.

Picking up the letters from the doormat she flicks through them, glances at the names, most of them are for Dick and Titty. There is just one letter for her, addressed to 'Miss Callum'.

It is strange.

On this letter the name and address are badly hand written, it's a cheap white envelope, slightly dog-eared, standing in the hallway she ripped it open at once, as she did so she had a heavy sensation in the pit of her stomach, she had bad feelings about this letter already.

Inside the envelope there was half a page torn from a child's exercise book, the sort with wide lined pages on rough paper. An angry message was scrawled across it in red crayon.


	10. Chapter 10

CHAPTER X

THE MESSAGE

**I** know bitch, I always knew.


	11. Chapter 11

CHAPTER XI

BECKFOOT AGAIN

**N**ow that the inheritance from Timothy had finally been settled for Dot, Titty and Dick arranged with Peggy and John for the three of them to spend a weekend at Beckfoot. They got Peggy and John to invite all the others. Happily and unusually, everyone could make it, none of them had other matters to attend to or could not spare the time. Susan said she would bring Roger with her, she knew he was always happy in the room Nancy and Peggy's mother had set aside for him just after the war, an arrangement they were still happy to carry on.

Once the date had been agreed Dick had then written to everyone, without Dot's knowledge but getting Titty's view beforehand, letting them know that there was something Dot would want to discuss with them all at sometime during the weekend.

They all arrived at Beckfoot at various times during the afternoon and evening of the Friday of the weekend, Susan drove down with Roger in her car, she knew he felt more secure than travelling on the train. John collected Dick, Titty and Dot at the station meeting their connecting train from London, then later in the evening, and last of all, he met Nancy and Daisy from their final connecting train from Essex.

Once these two had arrived and they had settled themselves in to Nancy's room, the same room she had shared with Peggy in childhood, everyone gathered in the Beckfoot dining room. With little help from John, or anyone else, Peggy had laid out a cold supper for them all. She'd decided to use the dining room as it contained the only table really big enough to accommodate everyone. Daisy had already promised John and Peggy that she would cook a dinner worthy of the occasion for everyone the following evening.

So they all helped themselves from a selection of cold meats, salads, breads and cheeses that Peggy would have been almost ashamed to admit to Daisy she had bought in the shops earlier in the day, Daisy was an enthusiastic and excellent cook, as they all knew, but when making her offer to cook a celebratory meal, Daisy was unaware, as were most of the others, of how their weekend would proceed.

John, despite it being Nancy and Peggy's house, enjoyed playing the role of host even to his closest friends, he enjoyed ensuring everyone had food and drink to their liking even though he played little part in preparing it. When everybody had eaten and their plates were mostly empty he stood up, which got their attention, and began to speak to them all.

"Good to see you all here again," he was immediately interrupted by Roger.

"No speech John. No!" John knew when his brother was joking and pleased to see that these days he did so far more often. He carried on ignoring the laughter of the others.

"It is good to see you all, and for us to meet under much happier circumstances." To his slight concern nobody really reacted to this, not even Nancy. Undeterred he then looked directly at Dot. "Dot, I understand that there is something you want talk to all of us about, would you like to now?" Titty was apprehensive, she knew what was coming and hoped that none of them had got the idea from Dick's letter that Dot was about to announce some good news, it wasn't bad news of course, but it was far from straightforward.

Dot looked uncomfortable, not knowing that Dick had forewarned everyone she wondered how John knew she wanted to talk to them all. Titty shifted her chair to be closer to Dot in case she needed comforting once she had imparted her news or began to cry at any point while she was doing so. Once Titty had settled back in her chair Dot took a deep breath and started.

"Thank you John, and to you and Peggy, for letting us all come here." She stopped, and for a moment to Titty looked as if she wouldn't carry on. "It's Timothy. I want to talk about Timothy." She felt herself holding back tears. Peggy interrupted, as she often did, not realising that this was one of those moments when it would be best to say nothing.

"We do miss him, he used to visit us quite often didn't he John? Never let us know when though. He always asked about you Dot." She went quiet, suddenly becoming aware from the silence in the room that she maybe should have not spoken.

Dot ignored her, she knew Peggy's ways as they all did and it was easy to forgive her on this difficult occasion, she loudly took another deep breath and continued.

"Timothy and I," she hesitated, "were lovers, we had been for nearly twenty years," she tried even harder to hold back her inevitable tears, "I loved him so much." There was an audible gasp from most of those in the room who didn't know. Peggy could not stop herself blurting out what some were thinking.

"But Dot, he was married!" Dot knew somebody would say this, after all, her own brother had.

"Yes, yes of course he was and he never loved her, she tricked him in to marriage, she tricked him all the time! I did stop it, but after a week or so of marriage we carried on as if nothing had happened." Then there was anger and bitterness in her voice. "She was wicked!" Titty, knew the signs, she interrupted.

"It's all right Dot, everyone knows that. Tell them the rest." For a moment everyone looked at Titty realising she knew more than any of them and wondered what possibly could there be to tell.

"He left me some money in his will." Nancy suddenly discovered her voice.

"Really! Good for you!" Dot ignored her and continued.

"It's not good, I don't want it!" She paused as if unsure about carrying on. "He left me ninety-five thousand pounds," John was clearly shocked.

"What! How much! Where did he get that sort of money?" To his surprise it was Nancy that answered him.

"He and Uncle Jim made much more money from mining than they ever let on, I always thought they had years ago, but it wasn't until Uncle Jim died that I knew exactly how much, and of course that's how mother was able to keep Beckfoot going and how she could to leave it to me and Peggy and not for it to be sold off for death duties." Susan was more practical and nosey.

"Dot, did his wife know?" Dot answered her.

"About the money? I don't know, I know she got nearly half a million, but about me? Turns out she did, though Timothy didn't know she did." Peggy spoke.

"How do you know she knew?"

"When everything was all settled by the solicitors I got a note in the post from her, a scrap of paper, six words, one of them an insult." Susan was offended on Dot's behalf.

"Oh dear, I'm so sorry." Dot appeared to have pulled herself together.

"Don't be Susan, I deserved it. But what do I do with the money? Titty and Dick won't take any for the house. Nancy, what about you and Daisy?" Daisy answered before Nancy.

"Of course we couldn't, it's yours."

"No we couldn't!" Nancy agreed. Peggy and John said nothing.

Susan glanced across at Roger, she could see that he'd had enough for one evening and he probably wasn't following the conversation very well, and if he was she knew he would soon get upset.

"Time I got him to bed, can you help me John?" She didn't wait for an answer and the two of the escorted Roger out of the dining room and they could all hear the three of them climbing the stairs to his room.

With John absent Dot spoke directly to Peggy. She was almost pleading.

"Please Peggy, surely you and John can do something with it, don't you need it to keep Beckfoot running?" Peggy looked almost distraught.

"Dot, its yours, of course we could use it, but Timothy wanted you to have it. He probably felt guilty, he must have wanted you not to have to worry about money."

"I know, but I'll feel guilty if I use it just for me!" Nancy then surprised them all.

"Let's all of us think about it Dot, then we'll talk again tomorrow night after supper."

"Yes Nancy, that's a good idea, please, all of you do that, thank you."


	12. Chapter 12

CHAPTER XII

NANCY DELIBERATES

**N**ancy felt deeply sorry for Dot, she had no idea that her life was that complicated for all those years, and now the love of her life had died. She couldn't imagine what she would do if anything ever happened to Daisy.

None of the others realised that she was so very fond of Dot. Perhaps Titty, or even Peggy, had an idea, but even those two could not have known to what extent she was and why.

When they all first met Dot and Dick during that winter the lake froze, she had 'fallen' for Dot at once, despite not being at all sure of her own feelings in such matters. Despite this she was quite sure that Dot didn't share them, such things did not seem to bother her much in the same way as they didn't her own sister. But then, as it turned out Nancy was wrong about that as well.

A few years later, she had gone through similar feelings, but so much more immediate and stronger, about Daisy and it turned out this time she was right.

Dot had always been a romantic, that had been clear from the start, but back then the others were not sure of her, what use would she be to the Polar expedition? Dick they accepted, he knew about the stars and grasped the notion of codes and signals at once.

The others had even made fun of Dot's plaits, until she and Titty put them in their place, she had even thought the plaits were sweet, they really suited her, but what could she say? The 'terror of the seas' would never admit to such things, had she done so the others would have been shocked and never understood.

Now Dot had to deal with twenty years of love and admiration being curtailed by the cruelness of fate, what would she do? More pressingly she now had money, a lot of money, she and Daisy knew what is was like to make do and be careful and would be thankful for such a bequest, they had been when Daisy inherited the cottage and the money that came with it. But Dot doesn't want it.

She had managed to avoid an immediate discussion for her, get the others to think about it and come up with an answer. Dick might. John, oh dear, John, he will be so straight about it all. She was fond of John, but so glad she didn't marry him as all the others seemed to have expected of her, but then Peggy had saved her from that, not intentionally, just that her feelings were not at all what everyone thought. Then her own weren't either as they found out when Daisy showed up that morning at the cottage in Wales.

Before Daisy she had always protected Dot, the others underestimated her, well, all except Titty, but when she heard about their adventures on the Broads, particularly catching criminals, she respected her even more.

But the money. What could she do with it? The amount, if she was selfish she could easily live off it, but her books gave her an income. There was nothing she wanted, and even if there had been she didn't want to acquire it with his money. It had to be something useful for others, Dot clearly wanted no part of it.


	13. Chapter 13

CHAPTER XIII

WHAT DO WE DO?

**O**nce Susan and John had returned to the dining room from upstairs, after settling Roger in to bed for the night, Nancy explained what they had decided on the matter of Dot's inheritance. Dot herself, not unsurprisingly to Titty, said she was tired and would turn in, and so she said goodnight to everyone, hugged each of them before then making her way upstairs to bed.

Daisy and Peggy started to clear the dining room table of the remnants of the meal and taking it all in to the kitchen, then got on with the washing up. Susan let them do it all, she had left her domestic side behind years ago, she moved her chair so that she could sit next to Titty.

"Did you know about Dot and Timothy?"

"Yes I did, I found out by accident about fifteen years ago, Dot asked me to keep it secret. She really loved him, his wife was evil, worse than the GA, I only met her once and she was horrible, just horrible! She just stared at me as if I was from a freak show and then said something nasty about all of us! Some nonsense about why did Timothy make friends with a bunch of snotty kids!" Titty visibly shuddered. Dick then spoke, guessing what question may come from Susan or one of the others.

"I didn't know, I had no idea, not that it matters, as Titty says they clearly loved each other. I felt sorry when she told me that Timothy had got his life in to such a mess. But it does explain a lot, and why he had so little to do with Captain Flint in the latter years, I suppose the wife wouldn't allow it."

Daisy, who had said little as she felt it had not much to do with her, spoke up.

"But what about the money?"

"What about it?" John asked.

"Well, what are we going to do, we've all agreed to think about it, Dot doesn't want it. I suppose she feels it's almost tainted."

"But that woman got half a million!" Nancy was, obviously to everyone, angry.

"She is his widow." John was being reasonable, as he would. But Nancy was angry and having none of it.

"Barbecued Billy goats John she was horrible! You know she was, don't you remember when she came here when they were first married. She was so snooty and rude to everyone! I should have kicked her out!"

"Shut up you two! We have to help her." Titty was more concerned with supporting her friend than moaning about an awful woman none of them, she hoped, would ever have to deal with again. "Isn't there any way we can use the money so it doesn't look as though one of us is just being greedy?" Dick was in agreement with her.

"Yes, there must be something we could us it for, something that would also benefit Peggy and John's children in the future perhaps." Peggy then spoke.

"Nancy, she did ask if we could use it for the upkeep of Beckfoot. Could we?" Peggy actually thought it would be very useful, there were times when she and John struggled to keep the house running, the days of a cook and a gardener were long gone. She knew Nancy and Daisy could not contribute much, but to actually say the money would be useful looked rather selfish of them. Nancy wanted to leave the discussion for the evening.

"Lets sleep on it, tomorrow's weather forecast is good for sailing. Anyway, It's time the boathouse was sorted out." Nancy's talk of tomorrow encouraged them all to go to bed, Peggy and Daisy were doing the last of the tidying up as John ensured the house was locked and secured, and they all made their way upstairs. As Titty and Dick crossed the landing they passed Dot's bedroom and Titty was sure she could here a faint sobbing, and wondered whether she should knock on the door and check if Dot was all right and then thought that she would probably prefer to be alone.


	14. Chapter 14

CHAPTER XIV

PEGGY"S CONFUSION

**A**s she put the washed up crockery from supper away in the kitchen cupboards, Peggy thought about the evening's conversations and, of course, Dot's admission and dilemma. But what she ended up thinking most about was her own stupidity. Once again she had opened her mouth and said exactly what she thought, how many more times in her life was this going to happen?

When she and Nancy had met the Swallows that day so long ago on Wild Cat Island, she immediately let slip that Nancy was really named Ruth and when the two of them got home that day Nancy made her annoyance known, but only for a short time, Nancy could be wild but never unkind. Nothing seemed to have changed in either of them.

Now she had done it once again with Dot. Why didn't she just listen to what people were saying and let them finish? Why did she have the almost uncontrollable urge to jump in? She felt guilty about what she said of Timothy. But it had never occurred to her why Timothy visited them so much and why he would always show so much interest in Dot, did John realise? She didn't think so. Timothy lived nearby, so it wasn't that odd that he visited, but he never brought his wife, thank goodness. John probably didn't think of it either, that was why when Timothy died it was John out of all of them that was informed, the straight, reliable, upstanding, retired naval officer who could be trusted not to say the wrong thing.

Ah, John. Nobody knew in those early days when they were leaving their childhood behind that she loved John, well Titty said she knew, but the rest of them all thought he'd marry Nancy, but it was her loved him. Nancy caused a bigger surprise when she 'came out' to everyone, except Titty once more, but it was her, the 'other' Amazon, that got John. She thought to herself, they don't really understand, they still just remember Captain John, but he's not anymore. She loved him, he's just hard work sometimes, still. Perhaps Dot had the best idea, but then she had to share Timothy, John is all hers.

Why did she say the wrong thing? She didn't think Dot minded. Too much to worry about, that money, so much money.

As she put the last of the plates away she thought about Susan and how she was not the same as she had once been.

Susan, what happened to her? She does nothing like that now, she never cooks, she never washes up, she used to do everything with me. Thank goodness Daisy cooks, and likes it, she is such a good cook, does Nancy know how lucky she is? Of course she does, she knew at once but took so long to really know.


	15. Chapter 15

CHAPTER XV

THE BOATHOUSE

**T**he next morning, as Nancy had hoped, was fine weather, a clear blue sky, and a good wind. Perfect for sailing. Some of them had woken early, got themselves ready and made their way to the kitchen only to find they were not the only ones making an early start. So Dick, Nancy and John began the day with a mug of tea each from the pot full Nancy had made, and then the three of them made their way outside to go to the Beckfoot boathouse.

As they crossed the lawn that led down to the river they could see the plaque of the skull and cross-bones, somewhat weather-beaten and faded, was still on the stonewall above the wide opening of the boathouse that faced the Amazon estuary.

They could see inside there was four vessels moored, two on each side of the boathouse. There was the motor launch, this was the most obvious from its position for being the easiest to access to get on to the river, the seating well of the launch was sheeted over whereas the other three boats were all completely covered with tarpaulins.

The three of them knew very well what the boats were despite being made anonymous by the sheeting over each one, Nancy walked around the flat stone pathway inside the boathouse and began to unfasten the sheeting on the boat moored next to the motor launch. John could not remember whether Dick had been there in recent years.

"When did you last come in here?" He himself had many more opportunities now that he and Peggy lived there. Dick thought for a few moments.

"Some years back now, with Dot and me living in London we don't get much chance. It's just good of you all, and your mother before Nancy, to let us keep _Scarab_ here."

"That's alright, it is her home port after all!" Nancy finally removed the sheeting completely from the first boat, John thought at once from the centreboard that it was _Amazon_, but Dick waited until he saw the stern as his and Dot's boat had one as well. They saw from the stern it was indeed _Amazon_, the painted letters now a bit faded. Nancy continued unsheeting the other two, they all knew _Swallow_ from the brown sail furled around the un-stepped mast in the bottom of the boat, and so that left _Scarab_ to be uncovered last of all. John stated what he imagined Dick would have been thinking too.

"She looks so small! Or am I so used to larger boats!" Nancy laughed and Dick agreed.

"You're probably right in both ways, _Scarab_ seemed huge to me and Dot when we got her." The mention of Dot brought back the matter of her inheritance. "Let's hope Dot can keep the money off her mind today, it will do her good to be sailing, something to concentrate on."

"So Dick, you knew nothing of Timothy and Dot carrying on?" John seemed to be back in naval commander mode with his question. Dick took no notice of his tone.

"No, nothing. He visited her flat quite often, but then when it started I was still in the USA. But what has that to do with the money?" Dick felt he had to defend his sister's behaviour. John thought he had perhaps gone too far.

"Sorry, nothing, I was just trying to make some kind of sense of it all." Having uncovered _Swallow_ Nancy moved on to _Scarab_, despite their obvious lack of use all three looked in a reasonable state of repair. Dick stopped thinking about Dot's money and began to be practical.

"When were they all last out of the water?"

"Two or three years ago, maybe longer, they all need varnishing, and _Amazon_ needs a new sail." Nancy was wistful at this, remembering when Uncle Jim would take care of all such things. "_Scarab_ could do with new rigging Dick, but it all costs money." This sent Dick in to deep thought. Nancy with John's help began to check each boat, between them they retrieved the oars for each vessel stored in the racks in the roof space of the boathouse.

"John, do your two have boats or do they use _Swallow_ when they come here?"

"No Dick, they don't have their own, they use _Swallow_ or _Amazon_ occasionally, but they don't get much time."

Nancy took little notice of this, she had plans for today on her mind.

"There's enough of us here so we can crew all three, we could sail up to the Island. Have you been there lately?"

"Peggy and I went to look some months ago just to check all was well, we get natives landing sometimes and worse still visitors, but no damage done."

"I'd hope so, they'll be keel-hauled if they do!"

John suddenly thought of his stomach.

"Come on let's go and see if the others are in the kitchen, it must be time for breakfast!" Without waiting for Dick and Nancy he started to make his way across the lawn to the house. Dick and Nancy checked the moorings of the boats one last time and then followed John.


	16. Chapter 16

CHAPTER XVI

SUSAN ON DUTY

**S**usan had been up early too, and when she came down to the kitchen to get some breakfast ready for Roger she could see at once she was not the first. From the state of everywhere she could see Nancy and John had already been there, the third mug? Could have been Dick, he was usually quite tidy, but then he would have just gone along with the others leaving everything a mess.

As she prepared a tray for Roger she thought about Dot. Twenty years with Timothy, fifteen while he was married. She was surprised, she knew Dot was no innocent or naïve, but she rarely gave any of them the impression of wanting excitement of any kind, or even a serious relationship. Then they said that about her being 'married to her career', they always said that, true, but none of them, except perhaps Dick, knew actually what her career was. When she confronted Dick about his wartime work back in the nineteen seventies she could see he then began to understand more of what she may have done in the navy. John didn't, so I've never told him, my older brother would never have accepted I'd been more important than he was, I didn't captain a ship but my desk job gave me more influence over the course of the war than he ever had. Father would have understood.

She continued to ponder all this as she carried the tray of boiled eggs, toast and marmalade and coffee up to Roger in his room. Another naval career cut short like fathers, only this one was destroyed by torture.

Now she cared for Roger, and had done so mostly on her own since mother died, she had tried to find out more of what happened to him in the Far East, but nobody knew. He was liberated from a camp after the surrender, shipped home and demobbed, there was no records or paperwork of his incarceration. How much he understood when they talked to him she didn't know, they told him everything that went on, well, almost everything, but never knew how much he comprehended.

Entering his bedroom Susan found Roger was up and washed and dressed and sitting in the armchair, she was pleased to see this, some mornings he needed help, this was a good sign. She had told him Dot's news, and how this evening Daisy would be cooking for them all.

She was relieved. She did no cooking or housekeeping at all, too much of their childhood they all relied on her, even mother did to look after the younger ones, the navy thankfully stopped all that. She was pleased that Daisy not only helped Peggy but she enjoyed it, Roger was enough for her to deal with.

The money, what could Dot do with it? She doesn't want it, does she feel guilty? John's no help, he wont say anything sensible, he'll want to give it to charity, or even to the awful widow, he always does what he thinks is the right thing, I remember when told mother about the night sailing, he had to, why? That won't help Dot, Dick will think of something.


	17. Chapter 17

CHAPTER XVII

BREAKFAST

**J**ohn was right, Peggy was standing at the kitchen door about to shout across the lawn to them down at the boathouse that breakfast was ready. Inside the others sat around the kitchen table, apart from Roger. As they all came in Susan spoke before John asked.

"I've taken Roger some breakfast on a tray, he prefers to be on his own with food most of the time, though he did do very well last night, he does seem to be making some progress."

The three of them joined the others at the table while Peggy and Daisy, who had agreed to run the kitchen for the weekend though Peggy knew it would be her doing what Daisy asked as she organised things, served cooked breakfast, toast and mugs of tea to them all. They all noticed, but said nothing, that Dot looked better and more relaxed than the night before. Nobody spoke to her of what she had told them.

"Well the boats are all seaworthy and we thought we could all sail to the island." Nancy as always was enthusiastic about actually 'doing' something. Titty had a thought.

"Daisy, have you ever been there?"

"No, I haven't, Nancy has promised over the years, but every time we visit here there never seems to be time!"

"There hasn't been!" Nancy was full of mock indignation. "What about Roger Susan, will he come with us?"

"I don't think so Nancy, it may trigger off some memories that he won't be able to deal with. His therapist has said that she thinks that if I ever want to do something like that it needs careful preparation, a few days warning and such like. He's looking forward to tonight though, well, your food actually Daisy, everyone keeps telling him what a good cook you are!" To the Swallows this sounded more like the Roger of childhood.

"Do you want me to stay here with him Susan?" Titty offered, knowing this would give Susan a break and she would have the chance to spend time with her younger brother. Susan looked and was grateful.

"Thank you, that would make things easier, and it will be good to see the Island again."

"Daisy, is there anything I can do for you for tonight if I'm staying here?"

"Not really Titty, as long as we are going to be back with a couple of hours to spare, but you could lay the table in the dining room."

"I think I can manage that!" Titty mocked her own domestic shortcomings, Peggy looked relieved that Daisy had willingly taken over that part of the weekend.

They all set to in clearing the kitchen table of breakfast, and while Dick and Titty washed up crockery and cutlery Daisy and Peggy packed knapsacks for each boat with some food and drink, chocolate, apples, grog and fruitcake. They all knew if they took more none of them would have room for whatever Daisy planned for dinner that evening. Since she and Nancy had lived in the Backwaters her cooking skills had become popular amongst them all, and Susan was relieved they no long relied on her for meals and other domestic matters when they all gathered together.


	18. Chapter 18

CHAPTER XVIII

JOHN'S CONFUSION

**J**ohn was looking forward to the trip to the Island, he'd often been there with Peggy but such trips was just to check that no damage had occurred through nature or those who visited, this was the first time for many years most of them had all gone together. He wondered how Dot would get on, like the rest of them he had been, or he thought they had, taken aback by what she had told them all the night before.

Timothy's death had been something of a shock even though they knew he was ill, but then to find out that all those years he was having an affair with Dot, Dot! It's so hard to believe that quiet, dependable, sensible Dot would behave in such a way. But she had!

I'd always loved Peggy, I know they all thought it was Nancy, she was too wayward for me, I was right about that when she nearly messed up the mapping of the Backwaters, Peggy was sensible, like Susan used to be. No, Peggy was always the one for me. But she still does not think before she speaks, how could she say what she did about Timothy? Then it was odd, every time he visited us all he ever did was ask about Dot, none of the others, not even Captain Flint. I should have noticed.

The money, I can't say 'yes', I wish I could, we do need it to keep Beckfoot going, not just going, really just to keep Beckfoot, I don't think Nancy fully realises. But we can't, it wouldn't be right. It's Dot's money and it's up to her what happens to it, so we can't have it. She must need it, her books don't make much, I'm sure, I've read about them in the serious papers but who buys them? I've never seen anyone, nobody I've told that I know her has even heard of her.

What can I say tonight? Perhaps Dick will say something, he's good at working these sorts of things out. I still don't know about what he did in the war. I think Dot has an idea, but she wont say, sisterly devotion I suppose. Susan knows, I'm sure she does, but then I don't know what she did either, odd the navy kept her on past retiring age, why?


	19. Chapter 19

CHAPTER XIX

WILD CAT ISLAND

**A**s they all left the house and crossed the lawn to the boathouse Dick held back so he was able to walk with Dot at the rear of all the others.

"Are you feeling alright this morning?"

"Yes, yes, I slept well, I always do here."

"I'm sorry about last night, it was partly my fault." Dot looked confused.

"Why was it your fault?"

"Well, I wrote to them all warning them you had something you wanted to talk about, I'm not sure what they expected, Titty and I thought it best that we let them know."

"That's fine, you're right, it would have been a bigger shock had you not said anything. I don't know what they thought was worse, me and Timothy as lovers or the amount of money!"

"Neither, they really do understand, everyone does. We don't care he was married, we all knew she was horrible, but it's hard to talk about it."

Their conversation was interrupted by Nancy shouting from the boathouse.

"Are you two coming or not! _Scarab_ needs to get out second once _Amazon_ is away from the boathouse!" Dick and Dot ran the last couple of yards to the boathouse, dropped their knapsack in to the bottom of their boat and they both climbed in. Dot had not sailed for years, and allowed Dick to organise things and just waited for his instructions, using one of the oars he manoeuvred _Scarab_ our of the boat house and towards the Amazon river.

"Shall I row until we get out on the lake?" He shouted to Nancy who was already on her way with Peggy at the tiller.

"You better, then you can get the sail up more easily!" As Dick sculled the boat out with an oar Dot took charge of the tiller and between them managed to follow _Amazon_ on to the river and then on to the lake. Dot glanced behind her to see John doing the same with _Swallow_, Susan at the tiller; all of them looking as relaxed and as if they had last gone out on their respective boats the day before.

The raising of the sail on each one had not been as smooth on each vessel as it should have been, and though Dick and Dot had the least practice their dogged determinism to 'do it by the book' meant they were slower than the others but did it first time. It was not long before all three sails had caught the wind and Beckfoot was behind them, they were heading towards Wild Cat Island.

Once they approached Rio on the opposite shore the amount of water traffic increased, much of it power and little sail; thankfully once they had passed Rio and its jetties there was less activity on the lake, visitors still avoided going too far away from what they regarded as civilisation.

Ahead of them they could all see Captain Flint's houseboat, except it no longer was. The houseboat had been sold some years before, Nancy and Peggy had no choice, the repairs to Beckfoot had begun to mount up costing way beyond what they could afford. Selling the houseboat was the only option for them. As they passed it on the way to the island it occurred to Nancy there was irony that the last of them to use it had been Timothy. Their mother had offered it to him and his new wife for a holiday, by all accounts it had been a disaster and they had gone home after just one night. These thoughts were interrupted by a shout from Peggy.

"Wild Cat Island ahead!" The others in their own boats had noticed too. John called out.

"We'll make for the Landing Place, there isn't room for three boats in the harbour."

"Aye, aye sir!" responded Nancy, with more than a hint of sarcasm in her voice. John ignored her.

Reaching the Island all three boats hit the Landing Place beach with a satisfying crunch on the sand and stones at the same moment, one of each of the pairs of crew from each boat climbed out, the days of jumping ashore were long gone, then pulled the boats further up the beach.

As the others all got out and secured their respective boat's painters to the small trees that now seemed to surround the Landing Place, Susan stated what they must have all been thinking even thought it was the most obvious thing to say.

"It all looks so small!" Nancy laughed.

"I know, I think that every time I land here, but I remember when Uncle Jim brought us here the first time, it seemed so big and far away from home!"

Susan wasted no more time and started to walk off in the direction of the campsite, the others followed and she was not disappointed with what she found there. The ring of stones of her fireplace, were still in position, and by the fresh ashes she could tell it had been used quite recently.

"Do people come here?" Peggy answered her.

"We think so, when John and I have been here we've never seen anyone but often the fireplace has been used and the pathway to the harbour as sometimes been cleared of over-hanging branches." Susan wondered out loud.

"Are they the same stones? They can't be!"

"They're always here, but I suppose one or two must be different." Dick was intrigued.

"But who comes here? It's your island." Nancy answered him.

"A few locals we know about, some visitors do in the summer, trouble is to stop them we'd have to put a sign up telling them it was private property, years ago everyone knew who it belonged to, the Swallow's mother got permission, that's how she met mother." John interrupted.

"Did she! I never knew that, she never said."

"Nor did me and Peggy, mother told us not long before she died, when she started to get her papers in order." Susan was more surprised by her brother's reaction than this revelation.

"I did wonder, I couldn't believe she'd just let us camp here not knowing whose it was, and then when you two turned up saying you'd been here for years that seemed to confirm things." Nancy looked surprised.

"Did we really?"

"Yes Nancy you did!" Peggy wanted to put the blame on to Nancy. "It was your idea to shoot an arrow at them too!" Dot looked shocked.

"You didn't! Did you hurt anyone?"

"No Dot, I just shot it in to the camp over their heads just to surprise them, worked too!" Nancy sounded pleased with herself even after so many years.

"We were so envious when you told us about the island in the winter, Dick and I had never done anything like that, weren't we Dick?" Dick visibly jumped, he had clearly been thinking.

"Oh yes. Do you really own this island?"

"Peggy and I do, well I've never seen any documents, but I'm fairly sure we do. Mother and Uncle Jim always told us they did and they both left it to us in their wills."

"But who looks after it?"

"Nobody really, Peggy and John come and check things are alright every so often, they used to bring the children here in the Summer holidays but now they're too busy with university and their own lives. Most visitors respect it, thank goodness. We'd hate to put up chains across the harbour or anything like that."

"Of course. It does seem very odd to own and island!" Nancy looked at Dick.

"No odder than owning a house in Hampstead!"

Daisy, who had said little and had never visited the island before, suggested it was time they had something to eat. Susan agreed.

"Let's go up to the look-out point!" They all made their way to the hillock at the end of the island that gave them a clear view across the lake, made themselves comfortable and munched away on cake, chocolate and apples and quenched their thirsts with grog. The peace and quiet they all felt as they looked across the lake was what Dick had in mind for Dot when he asked John if they could organise the weekend.

They all repacked their respective knapsacks and having done so John had an idea.

"Lets go and look at the harbour." Walking back they way they had arrived they deposited their knapsacks in a heap in the camping site and made their way to the opposite end of the island to the secret harbour. The trees were much overgrown, despite the efforts of some visitors to trim them. But they were still able to just see the white cross on the tree that made the leading lights. John looked more carefully than the others.

"There still a rusty nail here!" Nancy was sceptical.

"The same one you put in?"

"Why not, who would know what it was and why would anyone take it out?"

"I suppose not." Susan thought to herself that it would be surprising if it was the same nail, but if it was there was something quite comforting about it, that after all these years an symbol of their childhood still existed, untouched.


	20. Chapter 20

CHAPTER XX

TITTY ALONE

**O**nce the others had gone off to Wild Cat Island Titty was alone, other than Roger in his room, so Beckfoot was quiet. She and Dick had finished the breakfast washing up before they all left, and so there was only the putting away of crockery and cutlery for her to do. Daisy had asked her to lay the dining table for the evening meal she would cook on their return, except she had not told anyone what she was preparing; so Titty decided to wait for her to come back and ask her what she expected to see on the table.

Walking out of the kitchen in to the hallway, she climbed the stairs, made her way across the landing to the room next-door to what had once been Nancy and Peggy's but was now used by Nancy and Daisy. Through the open door of his room she could see Roger in an armchair looking out of the window, his breakfast tray finished with on the side-table beside the chair.

She knocked lightly on the door, only to warn him she was there. He turned.

"Hello Titty." Then he once more turned and looked out of the window. She entered the room, picked up the tray and went back to the landing and put it on a side table ready for when she went back down stairs. She returned to the room.

Moving the dressing table chair next to Roger's armchair she sat down.

"How are you today?"

"Good, good today." His reply was short and concise, since his return all the years before he had lost the ability to construct full sentences. What had they done to him? Even when Susan had taken over the bulk of his care from mother there was little they could find out about his ordeal in the Far East. Susan had even tried to use her position to find out more, but even that failed, until Roger himself could give an account of what had happened all those years ago it would remain a mystery.

She tried again to make conversation with him.

"Did you see the others?" From the window you could see the lawn and the boathouse.

"Yes, saw them all, good today." Titty had second thoughts about mentioning where they were going.

"Daisy's cooking tonight, a special meal for all of us."

"Good cook, good today." He continued to stare out of the window, Titty knew that this was not the best time of day for Roger, he would, she hoped, become more sociable by the evening, she suspected he might as he often did, so for now it would be best to leave him.

"I'm going downstairs, call me if you need anything." She got up and left the room, picking up the breakfast tray from the table on the landing and she went downstairs and returned it to the kitchen.

Other than the death of father, Roger's condition, still the same so many years after the war, was a great sadness to her and the others. In recent years, thanks to changes to his medication, he was far more sociable and easier to deal with than he had been in those early years. She felt sorry for Susan, who being single and retired from the navy, felt it was her duty to take over the care of him once mother had died. But thanks to Susan's forthrightness Roger now had regular therapy, which helped, but on a day-to-day basis they never really knew how he was going to be.

Titty thought of her own good fortune, surviving the war partly through a hedonistic lifestyle and the support of Dot, then years later realising the man of her dreams had been a childhood friend and the brother of her best friend. They had so far had fifteen years of happiness, but now the repercussions of Dot's life had to be dealt with; the money, and this was something she and Dick had very different views on.

She thought Dot deserved it, she deserved the happiness it could possibly bring having failed to find permanent happiness with Timothy. Yes, Timothy loved Dot, she knew that, but he had been weak, he should have dealt with that awful wife years ago, in fact he should never have married her. He really had been tricked, she knew at the time, but once again nobody else seemed to see what she did, but what could she have done? But why did Dot not want the money? Did she feel guilty? She surely didn't care, she had deceived the wife, or thought she had, for fifteen years, and that woman had much more money to waste.

A mutual acquaintance of Titty's and the wife, thankfully not a close one, had told her the woman was already spending and living a high-life with seemingly no issues of the possible suicide that she had spent years blackmailing Timothy with. Spend it Dot!

Dick, as Titty knew all too well, thought otherwise. Actually he disagreed that Dot should keep it and spend it, but had yet to come up with an alternative option for her. Titty wondered if deep down he really disapproved of Dot's affair, or was it just that it was his sister? Had it been anyone else maybe he would have looked upon it differently.

It was still quiet upstairs, Titty knew that Roger would still be watching out of the window, probably waiting for the return of the others.

Putting on the kettle she decided to make herself some tea, and while she waited for it to boil she went to the bookshelves in what was Captain Flint's study on the other side of the hallway. John and Peggy had kept the room pretty much as they had been when he was alive, so there were lots of old books on the various subjects he had been interested in all his life.

As Titty looked along the shelves one of the books caught her attention, it was slightly newer than all the others, the dust wrapper still intact and undamaged, she carefully eased it out from between the others. On the cover the title she thought she had read on the spine was confirmed

_Mixed Moss_ by a Rolling Stone

She had never read it. This was despite her finding the manuscript of the book, well the trunk it was in, after the robbery at the houseboat many years before the first time they had visited the lake. Hiding in the _Amazon_ near Cormorant Island she had watched the burglars ineptly bury it. Captain Flint had been grateful to her for the rest of his life, and particularly during the war years when he was very helpful to her with money. But she had never read the book. She couldn't even remember having ever seen it or being given a copy. She placed the book on the desk, scared of damaging it, opened it and began carefully turning each page. After the title page there was a dedication

To

Titty Walker

Without Whom This Would Have Never Been

She was shocked, in all the years she had never been told, did the others know? She sat down in the desk chair in the study just looking at it. She would read it, but before starting she got up and went back to the shelves, there were no other copies, she wondered if it was even still in print and if it was did the royalties go to Nancy and Peggy? She would ask them on their return from the island.


	21. Chapter 21

CHAPTER XXI

ROGER TRIES TO UNDERSTAND

**R**oger still sat in the armchair in his room just as he had been when Titty left to return downstairs. He continued to stare out the window. His days were spent in this way. Sometimes he would talk to Susan, sometimes he wouldn't. He would watch out of the window. Any window. He liked the window at Beckfoot best, he could see the lake.

He had seen Nancy, John and Dick go down to the boathouse.

Then Susan brought his breakfast.

He had seen the three of them comeback.

He had seen all the others, apart from Titty, make their way across the lawn to the boathouse. He had seen Dick and Dot deep in conversation walking behind everyone else.

_I think today is Saturday. It was always on Saturdays, or was it every day, it could have been every day, they made me stand in the sun holding a bucket of sand above my head._

_Then after an hour they'd ask me about John, John's ship, which one? Where was it? Which port? Then they asked about me Dick, where did he work? I didn't know, they had read my letters from him, I didn't know and they would ask me every time, where did he work? Why did they think it was important work? Deck's letters didn't say. Where did he work? I didn't know. He was at university, I told them. But they still made me stand. Standing for hours in the sun, holding the bucket._

He poured himself a glass of water from the jug that was always on the side-table, Susan had brought him a fresh jug full with his breakfast that morning. He drank the water down in one go as if he had not drunk anything for days.

_Susan, she knows about Dick._

_Susan told me Dick worked at Bletchley Park, where was that? What did he do? Susan didn't say, does she know?_

_I wonder where they are going, all of them, Titty's downstairs, are they going to the Island? I'd like to go._

_Where is mother? Don't see her anymore. Has she gone? Did Susan tell me about mother or was it Titty? Susan told me about Timothy, poor 'Squashy Hat', he's gone now, and father's gone._

_Who is Daisy? I remember, Eels. She's always here with Nancy, yes, she's Nancy's girlfriend, Titty told me, she's a good cook, she's cooking tonight, everyone says she's a good cook._

_Why hasn't Titty gone to the Island? I'd like to go. When did I last go? Did I go yesterday?_

_Every day they asked, what does Dick Callum do? Hot, hot in the sun, every day, standing. Hot today, they've gone to the Island, where's Titty? Titty's downstairs. What does Dick do?_


	22. Chapter 22

CHAPTER XXII

RETURN TO BECKFOOT

**D**aisy looked at her watch worriedly as they all stood around the small beach of the secret harbour, John was talking to Nancy about sailing _Swallow_ and _Amazon_ around from the landing place, wondering if they could still manoeuvre their boats in to the harbour using the marks to avoid the sunken stones under the water in the entrance. The others turned around and had begun to amble their way back to the camp.

"It's time we went back. How long Nancy to get back to Beckfoot, I've got dinner to get ready and cook!"

"Yes of course, sorry, we better be on our way. We could come back and try tomorrow John, just you and me?" John was tempted by the idea, particularly of sailing _Swallow_ alone.

"We could, do you mind Daisy?"

"No, not at all, I know she misses being here, what about Peggy?"

"She won't mind either, we come here quite often but only to check all is well, the sailing part doesn't bother her that much these days." Nancy was slightly saddened to hear him say that, her sister had changed.

The three of them followed the others along the path to the campsite. Before they reached there Dick, who was ahead of them turned around and was walking back towards the harbour, he had been rather quiet earlier on, but suddenly spoke quietly to them as if he didn't want the others to hear.

"I've got it, I know how Dot can use her money!"

"What have you thought of?" Nancy was curious.

"Look, I wont say now, I'll talk about it this evening, I'm sure Dot will expect me to say something."

The four of them then walked on to the campsite to join the others, they gathered up the knapsacks and made their way to the landing place, prepared their respective boats and once launched from the beach sailed back down the lake to the Amazon River and Beckfoot.


	23. Chapter 23

CHAPTER XXIII

DAISY WORRIES

**A**s the three boats sailed back down the lake to Beckfoot Daisy, in the _Amazon_ with Nancy, thought about Ruth.

In the early days of their relationship she always called her Ruth, even in front of the others once she'd got to know them, she never liked 'Nancy' and when she found out she was actually named 'Ruth' she had been determined to always call her that. But as the years went on and as everyone else called her Nancy, even her mother, it became harder and harder to stick to Ruth, so she eventually gave up and only used the name just for intimate and private moments between the two of them.

She had great sympathy for Dot, having to keep her love hidden and then to have it thwarted for all those years while Timothy was trapped in his marriage, it had been painful enough for her and Ruth, particularly during the war. Ruth had always worried about telling all the others, and in the end she had to force her to tell them, following her to the cottage in Wales and confronting her, while John, Titty, and Peggy were looking on in opened mouthed surprise. But of course they had all understood and supported them both, even poor Roger when he was told seemed to understand.

What worried her now was Ruth's reaction to Dot's news. Dick and John had been predictable, one, as she suspected, was logical about it and one was moral, the reactions of the other women were as she expected too, but Ruth?

She knew from her own experiences how difficult it had been for Ruth to accept and live with her sexuality, how hard it had been to show her feelings, but had Dot been Ruth's first? It didn't matter, not at all, but her protectiveness towards Dot made her wonder, did Ruth once have such feelings for Dot?

It was obvious to her that Dot would not have shared them, the directions her emotions and feelings lay were easy for anyone to see. But a married man? Why not? People marry and make mistakes, so why not single people making other mistakes? Except Dot had not made a mistake, and from his grave Timothy was trying to compensate her for his shortcomings.

What could she do with the money?

She and Ruth could use it, but of course they couldn't. None of them could, it would be greedy and selfish for any of them to say 'yes, I'll have it.'


	24. Chapter 24

CHAPTER XXIV

IN THE KITCHEN

**L**eaving John and Nancy to deal with the boats in the boathouse, all the others walked back across the lawn to the house entering through the kitchen door. There was no sign of Titty. Peggy walked through to the hall to hang up her coat and she could see through the open door Titty sitting at the desk in Captain Flint's study. She walked across the hall and spoke to her.

"Hello, what are you up to?" Titty looked up with a start.

"Oh you're back! Sorry, I didn't hear you. I've been reading Captain Flint's book, I've not seen it before."

"We hadn't either, John and I found that copy in a briefcase of his papers in the box room upstairs, you knew about the dedication I suppose?"

"No, not at all! Do you and Nancy still get the royalties?" Nancy who had come back in to the house heard their conversation and came in to the room before Peggy could answer.

"No we don't! Nobody seems to know who gets them, it's still in print too, I've seen copies in bookshops in London, you can get it in paperback too." Titty looked confused, she knew from what Dot told her how these things operated.

"Didn't your mother know who got them?" Nancy continued.

"No, I asked her after Uncle Jim died, she always thought you did, but she couldn't understand why in the few years before he died that there were no copies anywhere." Titty thought of something, again from what Dot had explained to her about publishing.

"I never knew he had dedicated it to me. Didn't he have a proof copy, or a first edition? If it was signed it could be worth a lot!"

"We only found that copy, and John has looked everywhere for any others." Peggy seemed equally confused. John joined them, wondering why none of them were in the kitchen with the others. He saw what Titty had been reading.

"You found it. Very odd! I did write to the publisher for Peggy, they just sent a letter going on about confidentiality. Come on, Daisy needs some help and Susan's gone upstairs to see to Roger, has he been alright?" Titty answered him thinking it was typical of John expecting Susan and herself to deal with all these things.

"Yes, fine, I'll just put this back." The others left the room for the Kitchen and as Titty put the book back on the shelf she wondered why Captain Flint had become secretive about it, she knew after the war he still made quite a bit on money from it, John and Peggy seemed to forget he had used some to help with their wedding. Making a mental note to look in to at some time she went back across the hall to the kitchen.

Daisy, of course, had already started preparing dinner and begun to organise the others. Titty remembered the dining table.

"Sorry Daisy, I haven't done the table yet, I didn't know what you were cooking so I wasn't sure what you would need."

"Don't worry, I'm making a Thai green chicken curry, so we'll need spoons and forks. If you look in there," she pointed to one of the cupboards, "there's a box of chutneys and so on Nancy and I brought down her a few months back." Titty was impressed, she had eaten it once in London but would never have thought about making it herself, but then she was never much of a cook. Having retrieved the box and found what was needed she went to the dining room and laid the table.

Half and hour or so later John called out to everyone, they found him in the kitchen, he had opened bottles of wine and served everyone a glass, other than Nancy of course.

"You're still never tempted?" John returned to a well-worn conversation between them. Nancy was irritated and went on the attack.

"Did you never see the drunkenness when the ships you were in charge of went in to port?"

"Of course, but…" he had second thoughts, what had Nancy witnessed back then that made her feel so strongly about it? "Sorry Nancy!" She ignored him and went to the fridge to get the bottle of sparkling water she had put there earlier.

Susan had returned to the kitchen with Roger and encouraged him to sit down, he seemed, to Titty, as she thought he would, more sociable than he had been earlier in the day.

"Can we do anything Daisy?" Susan asked her more out of politeness than any urge to do something, all these years later this still surprised Peggy.

"No, that's alright, nearly done, just got to wait for it to finish cooking and then I'll prepare some rice. You could all go in the drawing room?" She knew they wouldn't, Peggy always told her it was the most unused room in the house.

They sat around the kitchen table all trying to make sure they were not in Daisy's way.


	25. Chapter 25

CHAPTER XXV

DICK"S ANSWER

**D**ick, uncharacteristically, seemed uneasy, he had not spoken to any of them much since they had returned from the Island. Titty though realised, she had noticed at once, she knew the signs, there was something on his mind and he would not be diverted from it. If she had noticed, then she knew Dot would have too. They both guessed it would be to do with Dot's inheritance.

As they sat around in the kitchen they were all having conversations with one or two of the others, Daisy was busy at the stove and occasionally asking Nancy or Peggy to find something in the kitchen cupboards.

Suddenly, without waiting for a natural gap in the other's conversations Dick began to talk to them all, he'd always been like that and when Titty married him she was already used to it. He spoke in a raised voice, again something Titty knew was unusual.

"Dot, I've got the answer for you, what to do with the money." This got the attention of all of them and they abandoned their conversations, Dot especially.

"Thank goodness Dick, I knew you would, I knew."

None of the others said anything, they each in their own way had been troubled by Dot's revelation the evening before. Dick was not bothered by this lack of comment, he turned to a page in his pocketbook and glanced down then just continued.

"We need to set up some kind of fund that we all have to agree to spend from, but none of us can use the money on our own but we can all have access to it, and anything we do spend it on has to have some benefit to all of us." Dot looked impressed by her brother, but before she could say so John had immediately thought of a problem.

"But how do we agree on what would be a benefit?" Dick was quick to answer him.

"I thought of that, it's simple, anything we do has to have something to do with what brought us all together all those years before, and if we still can't agree then Dot has to make the final decision. And we all have to agree never to question any decision she's made." Titty was impressed by her husband's thinking, but still had a question.

"But what kind of thing?"

"That's simple, our boats all need renovating, so does the Beckfoot boat house that some of us have used at no cost for many many years. Then John and Peggy's children have no boats of their own, and if when they have children, if they do, we can make sure they have boats too! Lastly there is Beckfoot, how many times have we all stayed here, eaten here and made use of it. Those of us not in the Blackett family have used it almost like a hotel. The money can help the upkeep of the house so we can carry on using it, and when we all get older we can use it, if you like, as a retirement home!"

Nancy had listened, but said nothing until Dick had finished.

"What about when none of us are here?" Peggy misunderstood her sister.

"There's always some of us…oh, you mean when…" She shied away from the dreaded word.

"You galoot! Of course! When we're all dead?" Dick looked unbothered.

"I thought about that too, we set up a trust that will come in to force when the majority of us are no longer here, then the trust can take over the decisions as long as it does not harm those of us that are still around."

Before anyone could comment further, Daisy interrupted him.

"Sorry Dick, we've got five minutes and supper will be ready, so we can talk more after we've eaten. Peggy can you help me with the rice, and Titty can you take some of these dishes through to the dining room? The rest of you can you go and sit down!"


	26. Chapter 26

CHAPTER XXVI

SUPPER

**A**s they ate their supper in the dining room, compliments to Daisy on her cooking crisscrossed the table once again much to her embarrassment. To her, she had just cooked food for them all, she felt she had no special skill, it had just happened years before out of necessity and she enjoyed it.

Peggy, as she ate, thought about Dick's idea. Yes, they would all benefit from Dot's unwanted inheritance but she and John, and Nancy would be benefiting more than any of them. Dick was right of course, over the years they had all stayed at Beckfoot as if it was a hotel, mother always refused contributions towards food and each of them had always arrived with some small gift for her, which though she appreciated she thought was unnecessary. The house cost money, when they sold the houseboat neither of them wanted to and Nancy had convinced her, without doing so Beckfoot would decline to the point where it would not be saleable, Which was worse? No houseboat or no Beckfoot?

Had she looked across the table she would have noticed that Nancy was thinking too. Peggy then wondered about John, he did not own the house but being married to her he often behaved as if he did, and as much as she loved him this was really a matter between her and Nancy. She could see John was about to say something.

'The thing is Dick, if we set up, sorry, if Dot sets up a trust,' John paused to eat another mouthful of curry, 'even if the money is spent on Beckfoot it still benefits Nancy and Peggy.' Dick looked thoughtful. Titty knew from his body language he would only speak once he gathered his thoughts together. But Dot was ahead of him.

'Why shouldn't it? I don't mind, I really don't, I just don't want the money, I can manage, I make enough from my books and I will get some pensions, I'd rather everyone benefited, it's a really good idea Dick.' There was a pause, and Titty could see Dick was preparing a reply.

'Exactly, I really do feel we have all made so much use of Beckfoot for so long now that something needs to be put back, you don't want the money, we all understand that, and remember Timothy used Beckfoot too, he used to stay here and worked with Captain Flint. It's a choice between Dot's money supporting Beckfoot or we all see Nancy and Peggy lose their childhood home and a place we all like to visit.'

For a moment there was silence, then an unexpected voice spoke.

'I'm happy here. Stay here.' Roger, to their surprise stated his view. Susan and Titty had both wondered how much of the conversation he had followed, it seemed more than either of them thought.

Nancy suddenly stood up, slightly red faced as if she was indignant but she wasn't, she was actually a bit embarrassed, John they could all see was about to speak, she held up her hand to silence him.

'That settles it! Roger, you can stay here forever, you deserve it. Peggy, do you agree?' Her question was delivered in such a way that her sister knew there was only one possible answer, but it was the answer she wanted to give anyway.

'Of course.' Nancy continued.

'So if Roger is here, Susan and Titty, and everyone else needs to be here. And, I'm sorry Dot if this sounds selfish, to keep the house and to let you all be here then we do need the money.'

Dot smiled, it was the first real smile any of them had seen from her in months.

'Thank you, thank you. Do it, please do it. As soon as you can, whatever it takes.'


	27. Chapter 27

CHAPTER XXVII

BECKFOOT PLUMBING

**T**he setting up of the trust between them all using Dot's inheritance proved to be more complicated than Dick had imagined. The number of them in the trust made it complex, the money would first have to be invested to keep it separate from Dot's income, and to do otherwise would be a waste of some of it. Such investments would involve various taxes, and somebody would actually have to run it.

Dick and Dot visited her solicitor numerous times to discuss the matter, and after one visit and yet another lengthy conversation he admitted defeat, he recommended they go to see and use the services of an old colleague of his who specialised in such matters, only he was more used to setting such things up after a divorce.

To Dot it all seemed quite simple, the money needed to be deposited somewhere in some kind of bank account and any withdrawal or payment could only be carried out with the approval of all eight of them. She and Susan had long discussions about Roger being part of the trust, and it was decided that though he would benefit from the trust he was not mentally able to be part of its management. Susan had also spoken to his therapist and doctor, and they both felt that Roger would never be in a position to make the kind of decisions required by a trust. Roger's part in it would require protection of his interests.

Eventually the matter was settled, an agreement was reached and some months later they all gathered once more at Beckfoot to decide what to do first.

Everyone had in mind Dick's original suggestions, the overhauling and repairing of _Swallow_, _Amazon_ and _Scarab_ then the Beckfoot boathouse. Despite their agreement John and Peggy still felt guilty about taking the money for the upkeep of Beckfoot, but Nancy as joint owner convinced them.

Once again they were sat around the kitchen table at Beckfoot, once again drinking tea and eating fruitcake, on a Saturday afternoon the following spring.

'But we have to do something about the plumbing. When we're all here just having the bathroom upstairs is not enough!' Nancy was again on a particular gripe about the upkeep of Beckfoot. She knew Peggy and John were reluctant to push for the work to be done as when they were there alone one bathroom was plenty. Peggy tried to placate her sister.

'But Nancy, we can't use that money just to improve the house.' Nancy looked irritated.

'You donk! It's for all of us, even if we stay here at weekends and there's always somebody waiting to use the bathroom. Look, what about Roger, when he stays?' Susan had got in to the habit of letting Roger spend two or three days at Beckfoot, or longer, it seemed to pacify him. She spoke up.

'I'm sorry about that, but he does seem much calmer and happier here.' Peggy was quick to reassure her.

'It's fine Susan, we wish we could do more for him, it's so unfair that he still needs so much help after all these years.' This brought a temporary silence on the room.

Dot started to speak, they had all notice that in recent months she seemed more relaxed and confident, even happier.

'Of course you must, improving Beckfoot is just as important as the boats. We all use Beckfoot, Nancy and Peggy can't be expected to fund it forever. I propose that the first thing we do is build a ground floor bathroom and toilet for Beckfoot. Who agrees?'

For the rest of them Dot's insistence was enough to convince them that this was the right thing to do. John looked relieved.

'Well, if everyone agrees Peggy and I will get some quotations from builders and then we'll meet again and decide what to do.' Dick, who everybody could see had been thinking spoke.

'What you do, it's got to be in keeping, we don't want anything that will spoil the look of the house.' Titty was surprised, as her husband still often did, she did not realise he was so concerned about such matters.


	28. Chapter 28

CHAPTER XXVIII

GRAND OPENING

**S**ix months later and the new bathroom on the ground floor had been installed, making use of some of the space in the hallway, the existing bathroom upstairs had been updated and John had ensured it had all been done in keeping as Dick had warned it should be.

Once it was finished John and Peggy decided that they should invite everyone for another weekend at Beckfoot for a 'grand opening', he telephoned all of them in turn and found much to his surprise that the weekend he and Peggy had in mind was agreeable to them all.

Last on his list of those to 'phone was Dot, even though she lived in the same house as Dick and Titty he always liked to treat her as a person in her own right, not some adjunct to her brother and his wife. He dialled their number and it so happened Dot answered.

'Hello Dot, it's John.'

'Hello John, how's Peggy?'

'She's fine, will you be able to come for the weekend, did Dick tell you the date we planned?'

'Yes, that will be all right. John…' There was a pause.

'Yes Dot.' John waited, wondering if there was a problem.

'John, would you and Peggy mind if I brought someone with me?' John admitted later on when he had told Peggy that he was at first taken aback, but managed, he hoped, to answer without giving this away in his voice.

'Of course not, you'll arrive the usual time on the Friday?'

'Thank you John.'

Peggy, of course, when he told her, wanted to know more, who were they? Man or woman? John did not think to question Dot, she had asked and he had agreed. So there was much anticipation of Dot's arrival that weekend.

He had been surprised when Dot told him she would arrive on the Friday evening later than usual, and she would not be doing so with Dick and Titty as she usually did.

After Peggy's annoyance with him for not finding out more he then telephoned Titty to find out what she knew of this 'extra' guest, she was cagey and gave nothing away, being his sister he tried to find out more, but it didn't work. In the end Titty told him not to keep asking questions and that there would be no point in contacting Dick either as he knew even less.

On the appointed Friday Peggy had been even more worried, was this 'guest' someone Dot would share a room, or even a bed with? She despaired that her husband had not attempted to find out. But John, as he always did, was sure it would work out and told her not to worry.

Susan and Roger had arrived early afternoon, and he was soon installed in his familiar room, watching out the window.

This weekend Nancy and Daisy had been able to catch the same train out of London as Dick and Titty, and John met their connecting train at the station.

Peggy heard them as they arrived back and came in to Beckfoot through the kitchen door from the stable yard. Nancy was trying to find out more from John.

'But didn't she say? She must have given you some idea?'

'No Nancy, I told you, she didn't, she just asked if she could bring someone!' Peggy heard Nancy breath out noisily and went to greet her and the others. Nancy did not give up.

'But Dick, don't you know? Titty, I bet you do!' Titty said nothing, Nancy had questioned her for most of the train journey, she busied herself greeting Peggy.

'Titty!' Nancy almost shouted. Daisy looked at crossly at her and intervened.

'For goodness sake Ruth, leave the poor women alone, Dot will be here soon and you will know! Alright?' They all knew, Nancy especially, that having called her Ruth in front of them all clearly Daisy was annoyed with her. Nancy looked crestfallen.

'Sorry everyone, I'm just curious.' Susan came in to the kitchen from having checked Roger was managing in his room.

'We all are Nancy, as Daisy says you'll just have to wait. Now, are you going to say hello to Roger?'

'Yes of course.' With this she left the kitchen and made her way upstairs.

The others all set about getting organised following Peggy's arrangements. In the hallway they could all see the door to the new bathroom, it was firmly closed with a red ribbon across it ready for the 'official' opening.

When Nancy returned from upstairs she spoke to John.

'What time is Dot's train?'

'Didn't I say? They're driving here, they should be here soon.' John seemed remarkably calm to Susan and Titty.

'But Dot doesn't drive!'

'We know Nancy, but obviously her 'guest' does!'

'Well I think she should have told us!' Daisy cut across her.

'Nancy, I don't think you're in any position to comment!' This reference to Nancy's secretiveness over her relationship with Daisy years before quietened her.

Peggy looked nervous to Titty, and she was pleased to hear a car drive in to the stable yard.

'Is that them?'


	29. Chapter 29

CHAPTER XXIX

NEW ARRIVAL?

**I**n almost a mad rush they all gathered at the kitchen door to watch Dot's arrival, the newly arrived car was clearly expensive, John was impressed, whereas the women were far more curious to see who her guest was, all of them, even Nancy and Daisy, assuming that it would be a man.

Dot alighted from the passenger seat of the car, looked across at them all at the kitchen door, smiled, and then waited for the driver of the car to get out. A tall, distinguished man did so, he was the same age as all of them, he avoided looking in their direction and walked around to the boot of the car to retrieve luggage. Dot waited for him.

In that moment Dick has a split second of recognition, there was something familiar about the man, the way he walked. As he pondered this, that kind of thinking that distracts you from everything else, Dot and the man had walked to the kitchen door and were being welcomed by the others, then it struck him.

Dot's greeting stopped him from speaking his thoughts out loud.

'Hello everyone, this is Tom.' She gestured to the man. Dick then almost shouted.

'Tom Dudgeon!' Tom was pleased that someone remembered him and gave him a chance to say something.

'It is indeed Dick, when did we last meet?' Dick edge forward through the others and held out his hand to shake Tom's proffered hand.

'Many years ago, how are you?'

'Well, very well, it's good to see you again.'

Dot curtailed the conversation and greeted all the others, having kissed them as she always did, then she introduced each one to Tom, when she got to Nancy Tom spoke before she could say anything.

'Didn't you met the Death and Glories? Got hit on the head with an oar when they stowed away on that cabin cruiser?'

'I did indeed, so you're that Tom, the doctor's son?'

'I am indeed.' Dot then gave Tom a gentle push to move him on to meet the others.

'We'll have plenty of time for all that later, I'll tell everyone about you.'

She and Tom then greeted all the others, and then Dot took him upstairs to meet Roger.

Once they were all alone in the kitchen without Dot and Tom, they all fired questions at Titty assuming that she must know all about Tom and Dot's relationship. Titty surprised them.

'I'm not saying anything, I'll let Dot tell you at supper. Now Daisy, I assume you're cooking, do you want any help?'

'Not this time Titty, I think Peggy and I have things under control.'


	30. Chapter 30

CHAPTER XXX

NEW BEGININGS

**O**nce again, Daisy had done them all proud, it was a simple meal, beef casserole with vegetables, but with her cooking skills it became more than that. Peggy was again relieved, pleased that she did not have to worry about cooking for so many and for someone new.

At the end of the meal, Dot stood up and started to talk before John had a chance to do so as he usually liked to do.

'I know you all want to know about Tom, more of him in a moment, but thank you once more to Daisy for providing such good food and to John and Peggy once more for their hospitality.' There was much slapping of the table in appreciation and agreement with what Dot had to say. When they had quietened down Dot continued. 'We're here to see the new bathroom of course, the first work carried out by the trust, which brings me to Tom. As you know the arrangement of the trust proved to be too complicated for my solicitor who recommended me to see an old colleague of his, and when Titty and I went to his office it was Tom. I'd been told it was a Mr Dudgeon, but I never thought it would be the same one! But it was and he was so helpful, it is down to him that we have got to this point, and a new bathroom!' She sat down and wondered whether anyone would say anything.

John played host once more.

'Well, you're most welcome Tom, it is strange to meet you after all these years, we heard about you from Dick and Dot when we first met them, their visit to the Broads and then later about how they saved you from criminal charges!' Tom grinned.

'Thank you, it is good to meet you all at long last.' Peggy strode in.

'Why weren't you at Dick and Titty's wedding?' She blushed, suddenly thinking that maybe he wasn't invited. Dick saved her.

'I couldn't find him, we did try, Mrs Barrable had died some years before and nobody else I contacted seemed to have any information. It was a shame.' Tom took up the story.

'Dick and I lost contact during the war, I was posted to India for most of it, and when I got back I went straight to university and finished my law degree. I'd heard the Dick had gone to the USA and I moved around a lot getting started and experience. These day I just do odds and ends of specialised stuff on trusts, which is how I met with Dot. But it was good to work on something that had nothing to do with divorce for a change!' Dot had more to say.

'He was such a help, and it was such a surprise when we met, and he like me was on his own.' Tom looked momentarily sad.

'Yes, fifteen years now, my wife died, and we had no children, so it was good to met someone familiar who I didn't have to 'get to know' if you see what I mean. She hasn't changed much!'

Titty felt uncomfortable, though Dot still confided in her she didn't know how much she had told Tom about Timothy and why he had left her so much money.

'What about this bathroom, when do we get to see the first trust project?' Nancy had leapt up. 'Who's got the scissors for the ribbon?' Peggy disappeared off to the kitchen. Susan was more curious.

'Who's cutting the ribbon?' Nancy glared at her, none to seriously.

'Dot of course!'

'No, I couldn't. Someone else do it, please.' Dick spoke up.

'Dot, you do it, without you it wouldn't have happened, anyway we all just want to have a look, I'm sure John and Peggy have.' Peggy returned with the scissors.

'We haven't actually, John asked the builders to shield it all with black plastic sheeting and then they took it down and shut the door when we were in the kitchen!'

They all trooped out to the hall where the ribbon-bedecked door was waiting.

'Here you are Dot, say something first!' Nancy handed her the scissors.

'Oh! I don't know – God Bless All Who Sail In Her!' with that she cut the ribbon and opened the door while they all applauded.

For a moment there was silence, broken by Dick.

'It looks as thought it has always been there, they've done really well!' This is what John had wanted to hear, it had been Dick that had been most concerned that the new bathroom was in keeping.


	31. Chapter 31

CHAPTER XXXI

TOM'S THOUGHTS

**H**ow strange after all these years to be back with Dot and Dick, and to meet all these people, none of them are how I have imagined them over the years, and that Nancy is, well, why not?

I always liked Dot, she saved me from all that trouble over the casting off and the thefts, she got them to work on it, I'd never have got in to chambers otherwise, teenage petty thieves weren't easily forgiven back in those days.

Dick hasn't changed at all, even the same glasses, pity we lost touch, I wonder what he did in the war? Obviously nothing as dangerous as me, then the youngest brother, what's his name? Oh yes, Roger, what on earth happened to him?

Poor Dot, seems to have had a difficult time, doesn't bother me about this man, Stedding, so he was married, sounds like a complete mess to me. She was always too kind. Perhaps we can be happy, I hope so, early days, I was with Elizabeth, I wonder what Nell will think when I tell her, I hope she wont mind, I haven't told Dot yet it was Bess, it just hasn't arisen yet. I must do so, perhaps tomorrow.

WHERE DID THE ROYALTIES GO?

**J**ohn and Titty eventually visited Captain Flint's publisher, having got nowhere by telephone in trying to find out who received the royalties to _Mixed Moss_. Having explained who they were, including that Titty was the one of the dedication, they relented.

The arrangement had been made by Captain Flint after the war that the royalties should be paid to Mary Walker. John, who had dealt with his mother's affairs on her death had noticed there were regular payments in to her bank account that he couldn't trace the origin of. As they had no idea she was dead they had just accumulated. It was agreed with the others that they should be paid in to Dot's trust.


End file.
